Why Relationships Do Not Last?

Years of being married, meeting different (in terms of social status regardless of religion) married couples, sweethearts from different places I had been, I had theorized this conclusion why couples fall apart.

Although MOST of these observations apply on married couples, still some can also be for sweethearts:

Immaturity

Immaturity is synonymous to ‘being childish’.  Encyclopedia and Dictionary’s take on it are as follow:

LINK

Insensitivity

Being immature, one acts like a child being INSENSITIVE of the other’s feelings.  It may manifest in actions and in verbal confrontation.

-Examples of Insensitive Actions:

1. Coming home late without notice of whereabouts with phone off.

Husbands are mostly guilty of this.  The wife is just a phone call or eve a text message away.  If you have unexpected appointments after office that you have not mentioned to your spouse, take seconds to let her know. That precious seconds will save her from the agony of waiting at home worrying about you or getting hungry waiting for her eating companion.  Being a lady, I know how we can feel secure and this counts a lot if you do AND lessens the chances of fighting.

2. Literally pulling-out a pillow from the partner’s head while sleeping.

Funny and foolish, though this happens.

3. Deviating from the old ways

Sometimes it is better NOT TO BE sweet and thoughtful if you can not STAND or KEEP it that way for as long as the relationship exists. It results to lesser expectations, lesser reasons to be sad or to ponder about. 

Five Things Women Hate about Men

There are these things we hate about our male friend, boyfriend or husband.

1. Men do not seem to listen when we talk.

You have recited half of a novel, you really thought he is listening but…yes, he is asking “What?” when we needed some answer. That is just the time you will know there is so much time wasted talking.

Having Problems with Your In-laws?

Are you among those wives having problems with in-laws most especially with your mother-in-law?

Is she always meddling (?) with how you do things? In cooking? In doing the household chores? In disciplining your children? Or even with how you handle your responsibilities being her son’s wife?

First of all you have to understand, that his mother is the former queen of your hubby’s life. Yes, they have been attached since your husband’s existence. That is the real reason why the m-i-l seemed so “cruel” to you, there is just some little depression happening when they suddenly part ways as Mr. Hubby moves his focus of attention to you.  

You can alleviate his mom’s (now your mom too) feelings through understanding.  Telling her always that you and your husband are just around and her child has just became children now. That there is now the two of you.  

Recipe: Successful Love Relationship

What is the secret behind successful relationships? Is it physical beauty? I do not think it is, because I saw and met a lot of beautiful faces men and women so to speak but still end-up with a ruined relationship not just in early stages of “boyfriend-girlfriend thing" but also in marriage.  Is it stability? I knew successful wealthy partners up to this date and also middle-class couples that still survived their relationship for years too, that could not be the factor for some.  But we can not deny that it could be one of the reasons. Have a look at these surefire ways:

1. Perseverance and calmness

Abstain from talking back while the other is angry. This huge effort on the part of either the man or woman pays off. Avoiding discussion while the other is “fiery” , keeping the mouth shut for seconds or minutes goes a long way. Yes, it pays…try explaining when the other is relaxed if you wanted to answer the things hurled against you. Why? While the one is angry, believe me he sees no reason, she hears nothing but her voice. Frequently, the person who is angry is not in the right frame of mind, not only liquor and drugs can be overpowering but anger too.

Whatever your partner said, he did not mean it. The words are just brought about by spur-of the-moment situation. Do not harbor it against him. Let it just enter your left ear and throw it out on the right. I admit this is my weakness but I am trying to overcome it.

First Date Reviewer

What to do on your first date? Confuse on what to wear? Wear to go? Whose invitation to accept? How to act, etc? Here are some helpful tips for your first date :

1. Dress comfortably. Wear clothes that you can freely do what you need and want to do.

Win Over Your Husband's "Future" Mistress

It is about time that wives must examine what qualities those who became mistresses have that made husbands forget they are married:

Cheaters Beware of the Disadvantages

Hi! It has been ages since I wrote for the “Relationship” tabs of my blog. And here is another article married men should be reminded of  and why one must not opt to have an illicit affair:

Teens' Notebook: Telltale Signs of Being In-love

Confused on what you are feeling? Having passed the teenage years, I have gone through the stage of being in-love for the first time. 

My  daughters' (Angel & Riana) art work

Here are tell-tale signs you might be in-love:

Tips to Keep the Love Alive in Your Married Life

Missing those days you are just starting the family? Here are some tips to enliven the gloomy husband and wife relationship you are having:

Praise Your Spouse

-Say something that could brighten your spouse's day. The nice manicure, the neat coat and tie and the like.

Criticize in a Constructive Way

The Real Essence of Love

Love...Love...Love... four days on the countdown to the worldwide-celebrated "Valentine's Day" by our beloved friends; planning dates, sometimes even wedding proposals, gifts and the like became customary. Love is literally in the air..the music on the radio, the advertisements, the greetings seen and heard.  The shopping malls and other establishments are all dressed-up in red with "cupids and hearts" hanging around.

There is this "Valentine" fever, I suppose. But, the most discussed and uttered word is nothing more than "LOVE". Different person defines love in various ways, depending on experiences and maybe sometimes expectations.

Becoming a Better Friend

You may not be the BEST friend around at least you can be the better one. Here are some tips on how to build long-lasting friendship, tried and tested.

Me and my friends from London and Cabanatuan

      Be Honest

Being honest has always been a good virtue. How can you trust a person who always lie? Even in just little things – a glib liar? I experienced that, telling you like this or like that only to find out in some other way or thru other people that it is not true.  Big things start from small.

Listen

Always have time to listen to your friend whether the story is happy or sad. 

10 Tips for Gifts that will Make Everybody Happy and Thankful

 Here are some considerations when shopping for gifts for family and friends:
                       

1.  Age Appropriate

      The gifts we have to give must be age-appropriate.  This is very important if the recipient is  young or old. Why young -if your recipient is a toddler who always chew on things, it is very dangerous to give toys with small parts that can choke or those made of poisonous plastic materials.

     For older people, alright a book is not a bad gift at all if your grandma's eyesight is still as good as yours. 

Wedding Checklist & Step by Step Guide

These are the things an engaged couple must consider and prepare for a stress-free wedding day: 

A. Prepare for the things you will need one by one every pay day. 

If you are going to compute the receipts of these little things you will see it will cost you a LOT! 

a. Bride’s/grooms’ shoes/ bride’s purse/handker attire chief/casual

You might find this ridiculous but a signature shoes or lady’s purse might cost you your whole salary for a month especially, clothes to change-on when you are at the wedding reception. Some choose not to take-off the wedding attires but there are still others who feel comfortable changing, it depends on your personal preference. Handkerchief is a must! You might cry and got nothing to wipe on…just ask your groom to bring one for you and for him in his pocket you may return it afterwards, you will not want a hanky to hold while taking pictures!!! 

b. Bride’s accessories (head dress, gloves (optional), stockings, changing robe) 

You will need the robe while doing the make-up. A pair of necklace and earrings will do. Pearls always do the magic, just a suggestion.

c. Wedding Mementos/souvenirs 

 Some prefer to buy materials and make the souvenirs themselves for a matter of sentimental value, a personal touch. Others, the maid of honor shoulder the expenses and the acquisition of the souvenirs with of course the opinion of the bride. It should look special and appealing. 

d. Bridal Car 

If you do not own wheels, try to borrow from a friend or if your budget fits, look for a rent-a-car ahead of time. A wise client would not settle on the first shop, will always compare prices and services provided as well as time limitations and the like. 

e. Gowns and suits (the secondary sponsors) 

Some just buy the cloth to keep the motif and let the participants bring it to a dress shop on their own expense depends on your understanding (could be of any design or as agreed by the secondary sponsors/bride’s maids themselves). Others will rent on one shop so the design and color match, the bill as agreed; maybe shouldered by the couple. In the Filipino tradition, the Godparents (ninongs and ninangs) mind themselves whatever they wanted to wear as long as it is not against the church’s policies.